Never Look Back
by greivor of the souls
Summary: She never spoke to the house workers, or the guests, she never said one word…not even to me. She sat on the windowsill, staring into the emptiness of the world. Each day she sits there, never looking away from the picture of the country.


Disclaimer: Well, everyone should know that I do not only not own Phantom of the Opera, I do not own even the CD…what a pathetic person I am: ( There is something else I do not own, I do not own any of the characters or any of the places that are in this story other than Raoul's home. I do, however, own the story plot and certain songs that are used in this story…some of the songs will be from other bands and singers, and you will all be informed when they are used.

Chapter Review: In this chapter, nothing really happens other than Raoul's thoughts and a few of Christine's. There is some strange text in this chapter, but do not kill me!

Anyway, onto Chapter One, Remember When

Chapter One: Remember When 

She never spoke to the house workers, or the guests, she never said one word…not even to me. She sat on the windowsill, staring into the emptiness of the world. Each day she sits there, never looking away from the picture of the country. She has been staring at this scenery for so long that she could have told you where each leaf hung on each oak tree. Her brown eyes that once shown with childhood innocence not just six months before now held nothing but emptiness.

I knew that it was for one reason and one reason only…she only thought of her life during that horrid incident with _him_. She had never been the same since she had looked back at him as I rowed us back to safety. I think that he still processes her mind, forcing her to think only of his hideous face and his pitiful voice. There was nothing that she could ever see in him, there was only a monster whom had deceived her into thinking that he was her Angel of Music.

Still, her eyes never left the window, but they did not see the woods that stood there. No, she saw past them and her eyes only noticed the Parisian Opera House that lay over twenty miles from that very window. She saw only devastation and sorrow. She only saw what _he _wanted her to see. Her soul was still consumed by the monster in the mask.

XX

This silence still continued for two more weeks before a light rapping continued to dance on the wood of the front door late in a dark November evening. The staff had retired for the evening and I sat in the front room, staring at Christine as she continued to stare out the window. The noise continued, never ceasing for even one moment. This strange unannounced visit got me worried that it was someone in my family coming to tell me that my father had passed on.

After several more seconds of this continuous rapping, I got up with a groan and walked briskly over to the cherry-wood door. When I opened the door, there was a short man with red hair and freckles. He looked like a nobleman, but you could tell by the way he held himself that he was nothing more than a servant or a messenger boy. Still, he gawked at me before I glared at him and he seemed to come out of his trance and looked at me once more before he looked down at the envelope in his hands.

"I'm Victor," The man's voice faltered and he once again looked at me before he looked down at the envelope once again. Apparently this was one of Victor's first times delivering a message and he was starting to annoy me as he continued to stare down at his hands.

"Well, what are you here for, Victor?" I asked, my patience running low and my exhaustion was starting to catch up with me.

"I have a message for Miss Daae," He still sounded nervous, but still, he got the words out of his mouth. After peering behind me into my mansion he turned back to me and asked politely, " May I come in and give it to her?"

I knew that she would not speak to the man, nor would she read the letter. I knew that this man was wasting his time, but I had a feeling that he would not take 'no' for an answer. I lead him through the grand hallway and towards the front room, warning him that she probably would not talk to him or accept the message. Yet, Victor still seemed determined to give it to her. This man was an unusual one of sorts. It seemed that he had never been sent out to deliver a message, but yet he still seemed used to relaying messages at the same time. He was a very strange man.

It was not until we reached the door to the front room did I notice that the message he had had a skull as the seal. I went pale and leaned against the door that I was just about to open. I thought that we had physically escaped that monster. Though the woman I loved never said anything to me, I thought that this man would never be seen by either of us again.

"Is something wrong, monsieur?" Victor asked when he saw me lean against the door. "You are deathly pale sir." I looked at him a moment later, my color slightly coming back. I shook my head and sighed as I opened the door to her just staring out of the window, just as I had expected. Victor strolled into the room and stopped right before the edge of the windowsill.

"Mademoiselle Daae, I have a message for you," His voice was shy, but professional. Still, he received no answer, not even a glance his way. I noticed that Victor whispered something into her ear and she immediately turned to him with wide eyes and accepted the envelope with a small thank you…the first words she had spoken since we had left the monster's lair.

"I'm sorry, Monsieur de Chany, but could you give me and Mademoiselle Daae a moment?" The question seemed innocent, but there was something about the way that he asked. It was over cautious and mysterious. But I left, nonetheless. Though he asked me to give them a moment he never said that I could not listen to the conversation from the other side of the door.

"He is dying, Christine…" How dare the bastard call her by her first name and not mademoiselle? "He told me not to come, but I've found a note that he wrote to you only a few short hours after the mob came and I thought that you should read it." There was silence before I heard her voice once again fill my ears with the music she once always had.

"Victor, I wish to see him, but I can't. Raoul de Chany will not allow me to leave this horrible place…" Her voice trailed off. Anger at me and sorrow filled her voice with each word that she spoke. "I wish that I could be with him, but I will not be allowed to leave this place. He is keeping me a prisoner. Erik acted as though I was his prisoner, but I knew that if I asked him that he would lead me back to my old dressing room."

There was a sigh and the sound of a chair being sat in. "I love Erik, but there will never be another chance for me to see him without Raoul coming and forcing me back here. Victor, I don't know what the hell to do!" This was in a quiet shout, but it echoed off of the walls, causing it to be heard clearly outside of the front room. The words ripped me into two knowing that I was the cause of all of her pain and suffering. But she had brought me up to the rooftop of the Opera House and agreed to a marriage, she was the one that had said she loved me…she was the one that left with me after I had risked my life for her. She had brought this all on herself.

"Victor, I need to see him no matter what," These words were spoken in complete determination and it brought more pain to my heart that she was willing to talk to someone she did not know rather than to speak to me. Before I could hear anymore of her love for the monstrous murderer that had nearly killed me before her very eyes I walked away and up into my bedroom…the bedroom that was supposed to be for her and I once we got married.

XX

I knew Raoul had heard the whole thing, his footsteps were hard and pain filled. Still, I knew that he finally needed to learn the truth about the whole thing. Why I never spoke to him and why we never actually got married…why I did not love him.

Victor looked at the door as he heard the stomping up the stairs and after we heard the sound of one of the doors upstairs being slammed he turned back to me with one eyebrow raised. I shook my head and looked at him with a small smile on my face…the first one that I had had since I left Erik.

"Victor, in all my time knowing you I have not yet been disappointed about the fact that whenever you are around someone always ends up running off in anger," Though this was to be a joke, there was only a deep sadness in her voice. True, she had known him only for three months, but it always seemed that he brought tears to someone's eyes.

"Well, that is why he hired me, Christine," Though she knew who he was talking about she had to ask him just to know that she was not the only one whom remembered his name. There was a complete silence for a moment before there was a sigh coming from Victor before he said something.

"That is why I was hired by Erik," His voice was barely above a whisper, but it was still heard by the person that longed to hear it from someone else's mouth…to prove that she was not insane. She knew that people did know about the Phantom of the Opera, but very few people knew about the man behind the mask, the man named Erik. No one seemed to notice that there was something strange about the Phantom, if he was a ghost then how could he have kidnapped me and touched me like he was a real man.

He was a real man, he was Erik. Though he had tricked me into thinking that he was my Angel of Music sent by my father and had deceived many into believing that he was the Opera Ghost, there was still nothing but a man trying to get me to noticed that he cared about me. There was only a man that was tortured for the way his face was. 'The Devil's Child' they had called him before he was rescued by Madame Giry and taken to live under the Opera House. There was nothing about him that could make him the Devil's Child in my eyes. To me he was just Erik, the real man, the man that had done everything in his power to make me happy…the man that I loved.

If anyone ever knew that I loved him other than Victor and Madame Giry, then I would be considered crazy and thrown into some sort of jail for the mentally disturbed. Many times I had thought myself as crazy, but then I would hear the angelic voice of his sing to me one of his long forgotten songs and I would realize that I was not crazy…I was just a helpless girl in love with a man that was pushed into the light, used like a circus animal for other's entertainment. A true man, one that would stand up for what he thought that he was most important to him and solved the problems that lay beforehand instead of pushing them aside until someone else fixed them.

There was silence around Victor and I, both deep in thought about the same man. I knew Victor had never seen Erik without his mask, but I knew that he accepted him as a man and not a monster. Victor was a man that observed the souls of people instead of their faces because what not many people knew was that the man was nearly blind and could only make out shadows and sudden movements. He looked like he was a normal man, but his eyes always wondered around as if they could not identify exactly where he was.

"Christine, I wish you the best and I hope that you'll see Erik sometime before he passes on," Victor said as he stood from his red velvet chair and stood before me. He reached his hand out for mine and I gladly accepted the friendly handshake. And with that he had disappeared into the dark of the night. The night that looked so much like Erik's heart, yet so different. For this night had no hope while Erik had one more chance at life…I would see to that.

Author's Note: I hope that this an okay story so far…I have written this for I was sad and angry with the ending of all of the Phantom stories…though I only have seen the 2004 movie, I still say that there should be a sequel, so that is why I am here…

Anyway, I hope that you like it!

-Jo Pina Colada Tookey Shokisa

**Never Leave The Windows Open At Night**


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